Lately I have had the joy and pleasure of meeting together with some other moms. Most of these moms being new (newborn- 6 month old) moms. Now I am no seasoned veteran with a 15 month old, I am a new mom myself but it has definitely become apparent that there is a difference now in my attitude and in my approach than there was a year ago. It has been a pleasure in conversations to have the "been there, done that" experiences. It has cracked me up and cheered me up.
Nursing/ feeding- What a roller coaster this was with Carson. Formula/ breastmilk every 3 hrs. The spit-up battle. Now he eats table foods and he has the understanding that enables him to wait for his meals.
Nap/ bedtime schedules- AAAAHHHHHH What is that I thought in the beginning. Now Carson has a very good scheduled bedtime routine and he also takes great naps.
Now we are still in a extreme process of learning and adjusting and working out the balance; but how different it is at 15 months than it was at 3 months.
Today I also met a precious lady whose daughter has spina bifida. Her daughter is 35. It is so wonderful and so refreshing to talk with someone that has been there and can understand and can give you encouragement.
The one thing that has so efficiently dawned on me is how much of a gift time is to us. At 3 months old I remember all to well how scared and fearful I was. How insane I was with all the ups and downs of having a newborn. especially having a newborn with spina bifida. There was no real schedule, there was no guideline, there was no experience on my part. Everything was trial and error.
I was afraid to hold Carson at times... and then certain positions were an absolute no. I thought I would hurt him. I was afraid to let others hold him. I really thought that the scar on his back would just pop open and we would have cerebral spinal fluid all over the place. I thought it he cried for too long then the pressure in his head would cause the fontanel to explode. :) and then don't even get me started on how germ-infested everything is and how he must not come in contact with any germs.
Time... it has changed so many things.
Patience is not a virtue I possess. I am awful. I want instant results. I want to know what is going to happen and how. But that is not the Lord's intention. Nor is it what's best for us. Time is His gift to us
"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: " Ecclesiastes 3:1
" He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end. " Ecclesiastes 3:11
Time has comforted my fears
Time has strengthened me
Time has encouraged my heart
Time has motivated me to continue
Time has taught me in so many ways
Time has opened my eyes to blessings
Time has been on my side. Time has flown too. I remember all those sleepness nights with a newborn and how I thought they would never end. Now I realize it passed too quickly. My Carson is becoming a little boy and he is doing it way too quickly.
Soon we will have Silas joining us and things will change. Boy will things be changing. :) I have had so many people lately wonder why we didn't wait longer to have our second child. Why didn't we allow more time. Wait till he was more independent, more mobile. Maybe things would be easier if we had waited. I can't say when the perfect time would be. In fact, I don't know that I could ever conclude the perfect time in my own thinking. All I can say is that I know this is in God's timing. It is not going to be easy, I know that. But more importantly I know that time will once again bring it's precious gifts.